#I think it's important to give all of this context

[galaxythreads]

Also not to take away from this point because yes, good, but -

The line "you're not the only monster on the team" is delivered with important precontext. The only reason Natasha says it is because Bruce is saying that he can't give her a normal life and he's wondering what kind of happiness he could even provide for her. The idea of companionship alone being enough didn't occur to him at all, so he immediately leaps to - kids. She wants kids. That's what couples do. They raise a family. We are standing in a house full of children. He thinks that a white picket fence and 2.5 kids will make Natasha happy and that's the one thing he can't give her, and that makes him feel monstrous, because he feels so outside of the realm of "normal" adult behavior. He's Hulk. He breaks things, he doesn't create them. He's a monster simply by his nature now, a result of what was done to him.

Natasha recongizes this immediately and cuts to the chase by saying she can't have kids either. The white picket fence and 2.5 kids isn't the point here. Bruce is. Natasha then also explains about her surgery, an equal violation of her bodily autonomy and says, carefully, "you think you're the only monster on the team?"

She does not mean, genuinely, that they're both monsters because they can't have kids. It's because they can't have the same level of "normal" that it seems everyone wants around them. They can't have Clint's life. Not to the same extent. Natasha says this to reassure Bruce that the kids are not the point, but also to reach out and reassure him that he's not alone.

Natasha and Bruce can't have that "normal," and they both feel removed from society to an extent for unrelated reasons, and the only interaction they have with it is when they kill. It does make them feel monstrous. Especially with the added context that both Natasha and Bruce in the course of MCU make it clear they do want bio kids. Doesn't mean they can't adopt but it wasn't their first choice and they're allowed to want bio kids and grieve that they can't have that.

Like the thing is - Natasha is a very important piece of AoU, and when you look at it, Bruce is more her love interest than the other way around. But the important thing to remember is that narratively, they're not just love interests. They have discussions and relationships with other characters. If you remove them from the story it falls apart. Is their relationship a good part of AoU? No, I wouldn't say so. It's not the best written, the chemistry was awkward and disjointed, but this scene has never bothered me, because the layers to it are incredible.

Natasha could also equally mean that because of the lack of bodily autonomy, it made killing easier. It made everything easier. (What is everything, Natasha????) You think you're the only monster on the team? I don't feel anything when I kill. When I perform graphic acts of violence. You've been upset about hulk for the last day, but I don't share that level of guilt. We're the same Bruce. We're the same were the same. Why do you think I picked you? You make me feel seen because you know what it's like to have your bodily rights taken away. You make me feel like a person not just an experiment with a skillset. I can't have kids and I can never be normal but neither can you and we can share that grief together

Marvel women, written by men: 🧍‍♀️I can’t have babies 👶🏻😫😢 I’m a monster 😢😢 yes this is the deepest my backstory can get btw 😉😨 isn’t it harrowing 😱

Marvel women, written by women: I will subject an entire town to my will if it means the chance to see you again. I will drink my grief, knowing I am damned and that I cannot protect you, and will still sing out my heart to crowds of thousands in the hopes they will keep you safe when I’m gone. I crave power so intensely that it has overpowered any sense of loyalty to anyone, and I will betray again and again and again, but I will still be wounded when you betray me because it was you. It was you.

[twobellsilence]

I genuinely can't understand why some people still think of Anya as a clumsy, squeamish, incompetent bundle of nerves after finishing the game. Like you'd think that, even before the end, players would realize that Jimmy is a very unreliable narrator, what with his manipulative tendencies, the fact that he's literally hallucinating every other scene, and how different the rest of the crew seems to act from Curly's perspective. But no, many seem to take this version of Anya at face value, and it's very sad because not only is she the most important character in the game, but that description of her falls apart once you actually think about her for a split second!

Anya kept Curly, a severe burn victim and amputee, alive with basic medical supplies. This means she had to take care of him tirelessly, debride his wounds, set up and change his IV, change his bandages, set and clean a bedpan for him... Would a squeamish person be able to do that? A clumsy person who constantly forgets about things? Would an incompetent woman who, according to Jimmy, isn't even worth her title as a nurse, be able to take care of such a high-risk patient that needs tending to like clockwork? No, of course not! Anya is driven. Dedicated. Impossibly strong. This isn't just any patient, but her captain, someone who was clearly important to her and then tried to kill everyone (allegedly), which would no doubt add an extra layer of complexity to working with him in this context. And yet he's still alive and breathing and in top shape all things considered.

The only two things that point to her being incompetent is her inability to enter medical school - the reasons why are never so much as mentioned, but Anya herself says she has no savings, and I haven't really seen anyone speculate it could be because of money, not necessarily her lack of skill - and her inability to give Curly painkillers, which clearly triggers an intense trauma response from her, so it's understandable that she'd seek help from someone else to do it. And then there's the fact that it's not just anyone, but her abuser. Would an incompetent person steel herself and try to convince her RAPIST, someone she's so scared of she literally hid the only gun on the ship so he wouldn't be able to take it, to give her patient painkillers? She could've stalled. Could've straight up given up on trying to give Curly his meds. But she would rather face Jim head on than let that happen, because she's brave, and she knows what she's doing, and refuses to let even her very real trauma get in the way of her duty.

See what I mean? It's easy to see her simply as a nervous person, who spaces out and mopes and can't do something as basic as give a guy some pills. But that's the thing - it's easy. Once you go a little further, once you spot the discrepancies between her apparent personality versus her actions and the way she behaved during Curly's sections, you begin to realize Jim is wrong about her, and you are, too.

For a fandom that likes to overanalyze anything (as you should with a game like this), it's genuinely sad how the same effort isn't always extended to Anya.

[vxsellie]

Idk If you have Already Heard Dirty little secret- Nessa Barrett. But do It. Okay, Reader used to have a little crush on Ellie but all she want is a little secret, something that nobody have to know. She doesnt like Reader( she thinks) but tables turn, and Reader just like her attention when she's bored

(Sry bad english) Think of It pls.

DIRTY LITTLE SECRET. - E.W

summary. kissing in shadowed corners, sneaking out backdoors, touching in private; that was your relationship with ellie ⎯ a dirty little secret. and that's how you intended on keeping it. though, unbeknownst to you, she was fantasizing about something more permanent. notes. ok so first & foremost, i'm so so so sorry it took so long for me to write this, i have NOT been on my a game lately i fear. i put this in hc format so i'd be able to touch on a longer timeframe rather than having to fit a ton of context into a one shot, hope you don't mind!! also, i actually hadn't heard this song before, so TYSM for introducing me to it! i've been listening on repeattttt,, anyway! hope u like this! also!!! if you read in dark mode, you'll see that ellie's dialogue is in black. but if you read in light mode, it'll just look bold. i advise reading in dark mode or else it'll look a bit wonky, but if you don't i promise you'll still be able to see the difference! warnings. none of the smut is in meticulous detail, but i'll be putting warnings here nonetheless. subtop!ellie x dombottom!reader ; mentions of alcohol & brief desc of drunk sex. oral (r! receiving). head in a bathroom stall (yes we're desperate like that). grinding/ thigh riding.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆the relationship you have with ellie is a rather complex one.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆a few years prior to your acquaintance, you had the most piteous crush on her. you'd see her from afar and yearn for her to look in your direction. you see now how absolutely pathetic it had been.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆inevitably, the crush abated. however, it'd done so just in time for her to return your ardor. and so, by the time ellie actually took notice of you and began to reciprocate, you were over her. you were sick of putting so much effort into a girl who couldn't give a single shit about you.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆but, as it turned out, ellie was far more direct than you. while you spent months just staring at her from a distance, it'd only taken a few weeks of doting before she approached you.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆you had to give her credit, though, seeing as she had more aplomb than you could ever dream of.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆however, it is important to note that, when she spoken to you, you'd both been absolutely wasted at a college party ⎯ so that likely had a colossal part to play in her confidence that night.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆she came up to you when you were alone, a weary smile on her face. her cheeks were rosy from alcohol, her auburn hair a bit tousled. in your own drunken state of inebriety, you couldn't fathom why you'd ever stopped liking her. she was stunning.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆long story short, she only got a few flirty sentences out before you were directing her upstairs.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆altering making sure to lock the door, you'd set your red solo cup onto a nearby bookshelf before turning to face her with alluringly lustful eyes. her heart was pounding, absolutely entranced by you.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆in an instant, you were on her. her hands roamed your body as you kissed down her neck, slowly pushing her back until she fell onto the bed.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆you straddled her waist, taking no time to tug her shirt over her head. she aided you, pulling it off in one swift motion. you hardly cared for the dramatics though, far more interested in getting your hands on her.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆it was a bit awkward at first, the two of you barely knowing one another and not exactly sure on how the other wished to be touched. but you got the hang on it rather quickly.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆that night was spent with drunken laughter in your chests, bare skin touching preliminarily, and the knowing it'd all be a hazy memory come morning.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆afterward, you'd simply slid your clothes back on and returned to the party. ellie was a bit shocked by this, but said nothing. she wasn't in any place to judge.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆her gaze landed on your abandoned red plastic cup on the shelf. she picked it up, intending to use it as a way to spark conversation with you. your lipstick stained the rim, her breath catching at the sight as she recalled the way those same lips felt on her body only a few moments ago.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆with a shake of her head, ellie turned on her heel and began downstairs. though, unfortunately, she was unable to find you for the rest of the night. it was like you'd simply disappeared int thin air. it was maddening, but simultaneously was it captivating.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆the following day, she'd seen you around campus a few times. but you didn't seem to notice her in return. you'd either be walking with your friends, your laughter ringing in her ears like a melody; or you'd be by yourself, speed walking as you were dangerously close to being late to your next lesson.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆in short, she was rather disappointed that she hadn't been able to talk to you. however, in all honestly, she wasn't quite sure what she'd say.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆that didn't last long, though.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆a few weeks later, she managed to catch you in the halls ⎯ albeit accidentally. in a weird twist of fate, you'd bumped into each other while rounding a corner. her face instantly lit up when she saw who it was that she knocked into. you, on the other hand, appeared rather irritated, your drink having spilt down the front of your white shirt.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆ellie apologized over and over, insisting on helping you dry off. you wanted to deny her, but she grabbed you by the wrist and tugged you into the girls' bathroom without waiting for your response.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆you looked at your reflection and cursed under your breath as you saw the deep brown stain on your top. welp, your mood was now ruined for the rest of the day.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆you pulled your shirt over your head, now standing in only your bra as you held the top in front of you to examine. the stain appeared to not be too bad, likely able to come out in a few washes. at that thought, relief engulfed you.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆ellie's face instantly felt hot when you took off your shirt, her eyes averting elsewhere.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆"you're acting like you haven't already seen me naked." you said with an amused smirk, leaning over the sink to wash the fabric of your shirt. as you did, she couldn't help the way her eyes were drawn to your cleavage as you bent over. her heart hammered in her chest, face now painfully red.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆she stood in place awkwardly for a few minutes before you rolled your eyes and beckoned her over, reminding her that she's the one who dragged you in here and that she'd claimed to help you clean it.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆ellie walked over to you, the proximity causing her stomach to churn.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆her shoulder brushed yours and her mind raced with recollections of how your body felt against hers. she suddenly felt her stomach tightening with the need to be closer.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆now, you weren't a fool. you could tell ellie was turned on. she wasn't exactly slick about it either, her eyes on your tits as you scrubbed the shirt and occasionally on your ass when you bent over. but you weren't about to give her what she wanted simply because she wanted it. no, that'd be self deprecating considering how long you spent chasing after her. it was time for ellie williams to be the one yearning.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆so instead, you continued to innocently clean your shirt, using the floral scented soap to wash it. you'd position yourself over the sink in a way you knew she'd be thirsting over ⎯ back subtly arched, breasts pushed together slightly in the mirror. yeah. she was going fucking crazy, to say the very least.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆it eventually became too much and she found herself tracing the tips of her fingers along your forearm. how she got the confidence to even touch you is beyond her. but it worked in her favor.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆because fast forward a mere five minutes and you were both in a random stall, shirt left abandoned in the sink.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆you were standing with your back against the stall door, ellie on her knees before you. her tongue worked magic against your pussy as she ate you like she'd been starved her whole life.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆you braced your hands on either side of the stall, using the walls to hold yourself up as you grew closer and closer to an orgasm.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆ellie's eyes were shut as she focused solely on pleasing you, mouth making out sultrily with your clit.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆when you came, it was a mess. all over her face and neck as your knees nearly collapsed under your weight. ellie hardly minded. honestly, if anything, the taste of you only made her want to do it again. and again. and again.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆needless to say, she was hooked on you.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆and you quite liked the way she treated you, uncaring for her own pleasure as she was content with just watching you come undone. the sight of your rapture was enough to please her, in turn.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆and so. this became a habit.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆you'd be walking through the school halls when someone would grab you by the wrist and pull you into a random janitor's closet. you wouldn't even need light to tell who it was, the feel of her hands familiar enough for you to already begin stripping.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆alternatively, she'd be washing her hands when you'd grab the back of her shirt and pull her into a random stall. or eating lunch when you'd give her a look from across the cafeteria that'd wordlessly tell her to meet you in the bathroom.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆regardless of how it's initiated or who pulls who, the two of you always ended up in some lowlight place with your hands on the other. you enjoyed the attention she gave you, seeking her out when bored or in need something to relieve stress.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆though, for ellie, she did this because she genuinely liked you. she wanted to feel your skin on hers. she wanted to hear those pretty noises you made when you were trying to stay quiet. she wanted to be near you. all the time.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆but she knew you didn't feel the same.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆eventually, after a few months of making out in random places of solitude, ellie said something that shocked you.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆you were zipping your jeans and flattening your hair in an empty classroom, situating yourself to erase any evidence of what you two had been doing. then you noticed ellie appeared a bit disheveled. like, more than normal. she was fiddling with her fingers, cheeks still rosy.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆you sighed, telling her to just say whatever she was thinking. and so she did.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆"i was thinking... well, we've been doing this for a while now and-" she frowned, frustrated by her own inability to speak around you. even after so long of fucking you, she couldn't seem to actually hold a conversation without stammering. "um, well, wouldn't you prefer to do it somewhere nicer? like- i dunno, my place? ...i have a dorm on campus. we can-"

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆"ellie." you interrupted, pinching the bridge of your nose with a sigh. her ears instantly perked at the sound of her name on your tongue, something you so rarely uttered that she couldn't help the way she yearned to hear it again. "this isn't permanent, you know that right? i'd love to come over to sleep with you, but don't expect anything more. and i'm sorry if that comes off bitchy, but i don't want you getting the wrong impression here."

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆"yeah yeah, of course not." she scoffed, feigning indifference. "i don't want anything more either. just sex. that's what i was implying too."

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆you weren't sure how much you actually believed that. but you said nothing, not wanting to ruin whatever you two had going on. if ellie did like you more than she let on, you supposed you'd have to just turn a blind eye if you wished to continue your current relationship.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆that night, you arrived at her dorm with a light knock to the door.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆ellie had been stressing all day since your conversation. you told her that what you two had was nothing more than secretive fucking, but she couldn't help the way she wished that weren't true. she oftentimes found herself thinking of you during lessons, unable to focus on the professor's words. she was even failing a few subjects due to that.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆she wanted to clean her dorm before you came over, but she was scared you'd be able to tell and would reprimand her for going out of her way.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆in the end, she decided to tidy it up only a little bit, picking up her clothes that'd been strewn across her floor. and then hiding her journal that was filled with doodles of your nude body.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆by the time you knocked on the door, she was nothing more than a bundle of nerves. her breathing was shaky as she moved to open the door and let you in. the moment she did, her breath hitched.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆you were dressed casually, wearing something you'd likely be found sleeping in. your hair was wet, signifying that you'd just showered. she'd never seen you in with a domestic emanation ⎯ priorly having only seen you dressed up; whether that be in a skin-tight dress (the party) or the nice outfits you'd wear around campus. but something about this was different. like a new level of intimacy was just drawn.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆you noticed her staring and narrowed your eyes at her. "don't you look at me like that." "like what?" "like this is real."

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆she nodded, not trusting herself to speak, stepping aside to let you into her dorm. you looked around. two beds were situated on either side of the room, a messy desk wedged between them. you raised a brow, asking if she had a dorm mate and if you'd have to worry about them walking in on you. she instantly explained that her roommate, dina, hardly comes to the dorm anyway, much preferring to hang around her friends or in the library.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆you seemed pleased by this, glad to know you won't be found out. a few minutes passed of small talk before the atmosphere shifted to what the two of you were most used to ⎯ lustful desperation.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆ellie locked the door before turning to see that you were already pulling your clothes off. she chuckled, nearing you as she removed her own.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆you were there for hours, ellie unable to get enough of you. the sight of you in her bed, laid out like that. your damp hair unkempt, your body freshly cleaned and smelling of lavender and lilies. she just couldn't get herself away from you, pulled to your body like a fish on a hook.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆and you weren't about to complain considering she made you cum five times.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆when you two finally pulled away from each other, you didn't stay long afterward. you laid back in her bed, body slick with sweat as your bare chest rose and fell with heavy breaths. ellie laid beside you, eyes studying every inch of you she could get. she committed this moment to memory, never wanting to forget it.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆once you realized what she was doing, you huffed out a breath and shifted to pull your clothes back on. she watched you, unable to pull her gaze away. she wanted more. she wanted you in a way that nobody else got to have. but instead, she's left wondering if you're doing this with other people as well. she doesn't want to assume, and she'd never think lowly of you, but- well, she can't ask. you always shut her down when she asks personal things.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆and then, without another word, you grabbed your things and left, shutting the door softly behind you. though you made sure to peek your head out the door before exiting, making sure nobody saw you.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆this, too, quickly became a habit.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆you two definitely still had your usual rendezvous throughout the day. but when the sun set, you'd sometimes sneak to her dorm. ellie wouldn't know when you were coming, having to always keep her journal hidden in case you came knocking.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆as ellie lies you down in her bed night after night, she comes to realize that she likes this a lot. she kinda enjoys the way she doesn't know how you feel. your lives are kept private, separated so that nobody else on campus has a clue that you two even know each other.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆but she knows. and you know. and that's all she truly cares for. yes, she wants more. she wants to kiss you and mean it, she wants to pull you into her arms, she wants to laugh with you. but if this is all she gets, she's grateful.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆one day, a few months after your first visit to her dorm, the atmosphere felt off to you.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆you entered her dorm without knocking, that sense of unfamiliarity long having been abandoned. you walked in, seeing ellie laid back in her bed on her phone. she glanced up, heart instantly stuttering in her chest. you locked the door and walked toward her. you got onto the bed, crawling up the length of her body.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆she tossed her phone aside, hands coming to your hips.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆she slipped her hands under your shirt, caressing the skin of your stomach. you let out a soft sigh, reaching down to pull your shirt over your head. she stared at you, eyes pinned to your chest. you leaned down, kissing the column of her throat, leaving light bruises across her skin. she tipped her head back, her hands coming to cup your breasts.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆you rolled your hips, grinding down on her as you sought out friction. she lifted her leg, thigh wedging between yours. you continued to hump her, your hands on her shoulders as you held yourself up.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆she held you by your hips, fingers inching down toward your waistband. you didn't stop your movement, jolts of pleasure coursing through you as your clit rubbed against her jeans.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆she slowly began to unbutton your pants. the ease of which she does it makes you a bit uneasy.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆see, when you two usually fucked, i was just lust and sex and nothing more than mere physical attraction. she normally tore your clothes off, needy and desperate. but she was taking her time today, eyes scanning your body as she undid your pants at a slow pace.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆she'd done this a few times before, acting weirdly intimate with you. though, whenever you point it out, she's quick to put an end to it. you hope she does the same this time.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆you paused, chest heaving as you shot her a look. she paused as well, looking up to meet your gaze.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆"what're you doing?" "what do you mean?" "you're being all sensual again. we're not girlfriends, ellie, quit it."

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆she frowned, face contorting into a displeased expression that you'd never seen her wear before. well, it'd never been directed at you at least. she'd always been so patient with you. and yet.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆ "well fucking excuse me. y'know, sometimes i want to be treated like a person too, not just your goddamn fuck buddy. i have feelings."

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆"fuck buddy is what we agreed on." you pointed out, moving off of her lap. you sat across from her on the bed, glaring. "is it? because i don't remember being asked my opinion on all of this."

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆you scoffed, "okay what is your problem? why are you acting like this?"

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆"am i not allowed to voice how i feel? you tell me what to feel all the fucking time, but as soon as i show an ounce of distaste, i'm the bad guy?" "i never said you're the bad guy. i'm just asking where all this is coming from. you've never spoken out about this until now."

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆"does it fucking matter where it's coming from? it's how i feel, you should respect-"

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆she was interrupted by the sound of keys rattling the door. she cursed under her breath, pointing toward the closet. you hopped off the bed and hid yourself in the closet before shutting the door as softly as possible.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆you watched through the cracks as a woman entered, black hair tied into a ponytail. she walked over to the desk between the beds and opened the left drawer. ellie spoke to her shortly, sounding impatient as she asked the woman what she was doing here. the woman laughed in ellie's face, reminding her that it's her dorm too. ellie scoffed, though it was clearly all playful. you remembered that ellie briefly mentioned the woman who stayed here with her. dina.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆the drawer dina was digging through had been piled with papers and books. she reached into the far back, grabbing a set of keys from it.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚��┆dina gave ellie a quick farewell before turning on her heel and heading toward the door, casting a wink at the closet door you're hidden behind. though, before you had a moment to process what that meant, she was gone and ellie was opening the door to let you out.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆you crossed your arms over your chest, looking at ellie expectantly.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆she was allowed to have feeling; of course she was. but for her to keep them bundled up for almost a year, only to release them on a random fucking tuesday? that was the issue.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆"i've had a horrible fucking day, alright? and i just⎯ for once, i wanted something more intimate from you than just fucking." "what could possibly be more intimate than fucking?" "not physical intimacy. i mean, like, emotional intimacy. shit that means something. was hoping you'd come over today, sure, but not because i wanted to just fuck you and leave. i wanted someone to talk to."

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆you frowned, a sudden bile of guilt forming in your chest. you knew this was coming. you knew it from the moment you met ellie and saw the way she blushed when she approached you.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆but you weren't wanting a relationship at the time. you just wanted someone to fuck at some random party. and she was so good at it that you saw her and instantly wanted sex. just being near her turned you on. and it was only on a physical level. or so you thought.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆though, if you were being completely honest, you couldn't deny that you'd thought of becoming something more with her. you'd thought of her when trying to fall asleep; thought of her comforting you when you were upset; imagined kissing her more passionately, just wondering what it'd be like.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆but you'd been so tangled up in this lie that just imagining something more with ellie seems impossible. even if you know it could totally happen.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆"okay." was all you said.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆she raised a brow, confused by your short answer. "okay what?"

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆"okay." you repeated. "we can try to be more than fuck buddies, as you call it."

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆her brows shot up instantly, unable to process what you were saying. she blinked a few times, staring at you as she waited for you to laugh at her and say it was a joke. but you didn't. instead, you held her gaze and watched her with a heaviness she wasn't used to. like you were seeing her. yo were actually seeing her.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆"you're serious?" "oh, c'mon. i wouldn't lie about something like this. i'm not a fucking monster."

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆she instantly rushed forward, pulling you into a hug. you laughed, hugging her back. she peppered kisses across your face before finally landing one on your lips. it felt different, like this. ellie was right, you suppose, emotional intimacy was far better than mere physical attraction.

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆┆and, as it turned out, while there's a decent amount of dirtiness to ellie, there's nothing little nor secretive about her. so there goes your futile attempt at a dirty little secret, now made into something far more precious.

⊹ ࣪ ˖𐙚 perm. taglist. @luvsturniolo @kasqnxx @xlovla @ilovewomenfr @zzombiegirl @elliessweetheart @shawangel @defnoteleonor @abbys-muscles

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[cincodenada]

So, bonus fact about color temperature: it used to seem weird to me that we talk about color in terms of temperature. Seemed like something a marketing department cooked up, except that the lower temperatures are "warm" and the higher ones are "cool" - what gives??

What gives is that as it happens, it's not really that color has a temperature, but rather the other way around: temperature has a color! This is a phenomenon called black-body radiation, which is basically, if you heat something up, eventually it will start glowing just from the heat. We see this in really hot things on earth: this is the main reason lava is red/orange/yellow, for example! We also see it in metalsmithing - when you stick a sword or whatever into the furnace, it glows red, or if it's really hot, yellow or nearly white.

Now, the charts above aren't super accurate, so for reference, here's Wikipedia's chart of color temperature:

Which is important because the key is, this holds for stars too! Our sun's effective temperature is 5772K, and the "color temperature" of daylight outside the atmosphere is approximately 5900K, which is juuust on the red ("warm") side of white. Color and perception of color is complicated, and things like atmospheric scattering affect what gets to us on the ground, but the takeaway is that daylight is pretty close to white.

Why we think of red as "warmer" light is wading into the realm of human psychology, but I imagine a big part is that historically our artificial lights - from campfires to candles up to incandescent bulbs - could only get so hot, so their color temperatures were on the low half of the scale: 1000-2000K for a candle, 2700K for incandescent bulbs, and 3000-4000K for fluorescent. We're used to our warm cozy indoors being lit with a color temperature around 3000K or below. Even fluorescent lighting, while still technically on the "warm" side, is bluer than that, and we associate it with cold, clinical settings like offices. I'm sure there are color theorists who have all kinds of opinions here too. And because it's all subjective, people have different preferences for different temperatures in different contexts, and this post is great because it helps you figure out what yours are, and have names/numbers for them!

But anyway, in short: these temperatures aren't just made up - if you heat a thing up to a given temperature, it will glow at roughly the color associated with it! The reason we associate the lower temperatures with warmth is mainly that the only things that get hot enough to glow blue purely from their temperature are stars, so all the hot glowy things on earth are on the red side of things - even our sun is a little yellow.

(Candles and bunsen burners do have a blue flame, but that's unrelated to black-body radiation, and they are much cooler than 6000K. Similarly, the color of heated metal doesn't exactly correspond to black-body radiation because metal is not an idealized body that absorbs all energy [aka a "black body"], but it's pretty close. Color is complicated!)

There are so many different shades of white light bulbs, I am so overwhelmed walking down the light bulb aisle, and then I'm never happy with the one I choose, no matter which one I choose, I get it home and I put it in and I'm like, ugh, I don't like THAT white

[charmac]

How are you feeling about S17? I'm getting reaaal worried that it's going to be terrible. No Glenn in the writers room? A crossover episode?? Rob's gradual transformation into pondslime??? Help

Pondslime 😭Lmfao

I'm feeling more than fine about 17, really truly. I don't think anyone should be worried at all.

I think sometimes my interactions with Glenn come off a little more serious or abrasive than they really happened in real life (because we have to shout due to how loud it is in the bars), and my immediate transcription is just to get people *information*, which really doesn't convey tone.

For example, reporting that Glenn said "you don't want to know" in response to me asking for any teasers (as to plots this season) was met with a lot of "oh so this season is gonna suck" on Twitter, and that could not be further than the truth (sorry to the people I split-react blocked for saying that lol). In hindsight I get the reaction, because written out it's a response that can be easily misinterpreted and reads as potentially concerning, but know that when Glenn said "you don't want to know" he looked like this:

And when I was genuinely just asking for script information (regarding writers of individual scripts after he mentioned they had broken already) and mentioned Nina (Inflates) and Ross (DTAMHD), he gushed about both of them and then said, transcribed word for word, "It's been a good room, I'll say this it's been a great room. It's been an all-star room, it's been...like, breaking the stories this year has been really fun. [Me: Yeah?] Yeah. [That's great, that is great to hear.] It's been really fun."

So the idea of "no Glenn in the writers room" is really much more akin to Season 16 than 13/14. He was there to break stories (meaning he was in the room when they were brainstorming plot ideas and when they settled on which plots would be turned into scripts) but Rob and Charlie are taking the brunt of writing their (RCG's) scripts because of Sirens. This is the same thing that happened with The Gang Goes Bowling. Glenn's name is on the script, but Rob and Charlie wrote the majority of it while Glenn was shooting Blackberry. (I remember originally being convinced it was a mistake Glenn was listed as a writer for Bowling, lmfao). And Glenn is definitely still contributing, will be on revisions for the non-RCG scripts, and will classically change or improv whatever he thinks is best for Dennis when he's on set (see: the Risk E. Rats script).

Also, I know the crossover is concerning to a lot of people just given the nature of it, but as of what we know right now it's only on Abbott, so it's really just as if this season's The Gang Cracks the Liberty Bell or The Janitor Always Mops Twice took place on a different show instead of ours...

I promise promise promise Glenn was clearly holding his tongue for good things coming up, and Friday night very much restored my confidence that Season 17 will be good. (But..if you don't think Glenn has good contributions to Sunny or understands the agenda, then sorry this response probably sucks lmfao)

[sosadraws]

I think MNHR units should be allowed to be on fucked up situations.

[8-evil-annoying-catboys]

i definitely agree with you on pretty much everything here. i brought up the comparison not to necessarily assert that benevolent sexism and misandry are one and the same—they are not, as you’ve eloquently explained already. i mostly asked the question rhetorically, hoping that other readers may think critically about misandry and how it is still sexism and still harmful to women in the long run, and how the end results of misandry and benevolent sexism are often indistinguishable from each other, if not always. i was not intending to ask you directly, although i enjoyed reading your response and my perspective has shifted, even if only slightly, from new information.

i did not necessarily think through the systemic applications of benevolent sexism, i’ll admit. but i did make a point to say that both misandry and benevolent sexism come with the idea that men are dangerous OR bad, and women are safe OR good, rather than both ideologies believing both that men are dangerous AND that they are bad, although i can definitely see how a small word change like that can get lost in the overall reading of a post or comment. i’m saying this not to argue or anything, but just because i want to be clear that i do not believe that these two concepts are entirely the same, just that they are so similar in their application and the general attitudes that people with these ideologies hold, that their ideological differences end up being negligible in practicality. and the differences are negligible not because those differences don’t exist, but because it’s sort of an illusion of choice… at the end of the day, if you’re arguing that women are pure and safe and calming, does it matter that much to the person listening to you whether you think men are bad, or you think they deserve and need women as a ‘warm bath’ to recuperate from the harsh world outside their shared homes? i would say that, well obviously context is important so sometimes yes it will matter, but generally, not really.

people will read what they want to read into your arguments, and often come away with their own takeaway that may be entirely different from your intention. besides that, one of the main differences in between misandry and benevolent sexism is the belief that men are universally bad, evil, or lack self-control. that belief is false and can and will be disproved by material reality. because of this falsehood, the misandrist-to-benevolent-sexist pipeline is practically inescapable unless you have absolutely no trouble entirely separating yourself from men, therefore anyone making misandrist arguments will inevitably cause other women to get caught up in that pipeline, even if the person arguing isn’t concerned with interacting with men and doesn’t give them any opportunities to prove the reality that good men exist.

but all that is just my beliefs. i think it’s more effective to ask questions than to make statements, if we hope to break harmful beliefs in others. i would hope that anyone reading this would think critically about their own beliefs about men and women and whether or not there are any meaningful, inherent differences between them, any hard and fast rules that apply to all women or all men, and whether or not separatism is useful in any case… but they may choose to refuse to examine their beliefs since i stated mine so plainly, instead of simply posing questions. people hate being told they’re wrong more than they hate being asked if they’re sure they’re right ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

We need to bring back the term “benevolent sexism” into widespread use for real. It’s a major mechanism in how bioessentialist Girlboss Radfems can be turned into bioessentialist conservative Tradwives.

[psychobind]

COOL HERO STUFF

Relevent Translations from the LOV cards mostly regarding Noel and Bokhohn

NOEL

Age: Two years older than Rocbouquet

Height: 6'2"

Weight: 110 kg

Maximum Speed: Exhibits his greatest speed, 30 m/s

Blood Relative: Rocbouquet's older brother

Crony: Sagzaar

Sworn Enemy: The Desert Guards

Subject of Absorption:All people who are masters in their fields/trades

Role: Supporting everybody

Fatal Technique: Moon Shade

Favorite Technique: Counter

Special Skill: Shaking hands with the opponent

Hobby: Astronomical observation

Past Objective: To contribute new knowledge to the human race

Current Goal: To acquire all the knowledge in the universe

Searching for: A dimension transfer device

A word to the Emperor: "I am not a frog."

Favorite Spot: Ueno (the town he was named after)

"You're a kind of hero, aren't you?"

I've never thought of myself as a hero. I simply spend my days on the battlefield.

"That's exactly what makes you a hero. Isn't it something that ordinary people couldn't do?"

If that's the condition for being a hero, then perhaps I am.

"Don't you feel there's something similar between the way the Emperor's power is passed down through generations and us?"

"Oh, brother, what kind of joke is that? There's no way they could resemble us. Impossible." Rocbouquet winked.

"Even in a crisis for the Seven Heroes, you remain carefree. I suppose I should see it as a chance to absorb the Emperor's power myself."

----------------------------------------------

BOKHOHN

Past Goal: Entering politics

Hobby: Games he can win

Profession: Lawyer

Objective: To leave his mark in history

Absorption Target: Puppet master

Current Goal: Life under his control

Role: Strategist

Preferred Vehicle: Land Battleship

A word to the Emperor: "Fool, you're too soft!"

Future Strategy: Surprise attacks

Special Move: Waterfowl Sword

Favorite Thing: Marionette

"Why must I follow the commands of someone like you?"

Here comes yet another hopeless savior, it seems.

"You're just a young upstart. All you need to do is follow the strategy I've devised. Act on your own, and you're bound to fail."

"Next, let's pit the Emperor against Rocbouquet," Bokhohn mused to himself in a room within the land battleship.

"If Rocbouquet defeats the Emperor, all the better. And if Rocbouquet is defeated… well, I can't wait to see Noel's reaction. I almost want the Emperor to put up a good fight, heh heh heh."

Meanwhile, the Emperor was initiating an infiltration mission into the land battleship.

-----------------------------------

Heroes do some chattings

Noel's Card

"A new secret technique that surpasses the Law of Assimilation?" Wagnas asked, intrigued.

"Yes. It doesn't just assimilate the body but also absorbs abilities and knowledge,"

Wagnas' eyes lit up, "That's incredible. Perhaps we should call it... the Law of Absorption."

Noel gave a thoughtful pause, then added, "However, there's a significant risk involved."

Wagnas' Card

"There's a possibility that one might be influenced by the personality and experiences of those they absorb," Noel said quietly.

"If you absorb a killer, you might start to find pleasure in murder."

Wagnas laughed. "That's exactly what I want. Without that level of resolve, how could we possibly save the world? It doesn't matter what happens to us as long as the world is saved."

Subier's Card

"Subier, will you continue to fight by my side? As Noel said, there's danger ahead," Wagnas' smile had faded.

"No need to ask," Subier replied with a hearty laugh. "I don't fully understand Noel's complicated talk, but I trust you. That's all that matters, right?"

The three exchanged smiles and (something I couldnt translate properly...)

Dantarg's Card

"I can become stronger, right? That's exactly what I want," Dantarg's reply was straightforward.

"You might end up absorbing more than just strength-- things like kindness, or even love," Noel teased.

"Hmph. I'll just be selective about who I absorb. I'll go after those who live purely for battle, the crazed and monstrous types. Just like me." Dantarg's hearty laughter echoed around them.

Rocbouquet's Card

"Am I a burden? Onii-sama!" Her eyes filled with tears.

"Noel is only concerned for your safety. He doesn't think of you as a burden at all," Wagnas tried to console her, but it only made things worse.

"Even Lord Wagnas is leaving me out. It's terrible, so terrible! After everything we've been through together…"

Noel knew well enough that once she reached this point, there was no stopping her. "Wagnas, please include her as well," he pleaded.

Bokhohn's Card

"Why didn't you call on me?"

Wagnas and Noel exchanged glances.

"Well… we thought matters like this wouldn't interest you," Noel replied, only to be interrupted by Bokhohn.

"Your selection was clearly a mistake. There's a lack of strategy here. Dantarg and Subier are just brute strength, and the need for Rocbouquet is... questionable. This group requires a mind like mine. Surely, you understand that, Wagnas?"

Kzinssie's Card

"Don't leave me behind!" Kzinssie pleaded.

"Tch, pathetic worm," Dantarg scoffed, spitting dismissively.

"You're of no use to us," Bokhohn ignored him.

"Stop it, don't come near me," Rocbouquet shuddered in disgust.

"You don't need to come," Subier said firmly.

"You've done enough," Wagnas' gentle voice held a hint of rejection.

"Please, give me a chance too," Kzinssie clung desperately to Noel.

[fiercestcorpse]

still absolutely baffled by the fact that when the untamed got popular on here you had people posting stuff like "i know it seems kind of weird and confusing for the first couple of episodes but don't worry, it picks up after that" like what the hell are you talking about. i loved the first couple of episodes. i was having the time of my life right from the opening monologue and it only got better from there.

[lilacerull0]

i feel like reading/watching mbf immediately means knowing who i am as a person and... i cannot allow this

[spotaus]

After *checks calendar* several weeks, I return to continue this chain!

Okay okay. I had to reread a lil to see wtf we left off on, but if I'm right this was about the whole Geno losing everyone's trust, so let's do a run-through on what you didn't expertly address during ur lovely drabble hehe-

Nightmare loves his plan of making a safe space! Initially it started as making a safe-space for himself and Ccino, but then extended to Killer. And then the people he kept hiring on to give them better chances. And then his other knights. And then Error. And then- Yeah, he loves his family and if he can do anything for them, it's give them peace!

And omg I forgot about having Dream intervene in this matter for the drama of having a lie detector (Night couldn't do it himself anymore, so he needs the one other person who knew how to do something like that!) and !!!! Gods Dream picking up on the context as the conversation keeps going and afterwards comforting Night? Oughhh. I'm gonna cry--- I love Dream getting hints of character development again too!! After everything he gets to improve :]

Their reactions are definitely a fun thing to touch on again later, but, yeah!!!

Cross in particular would be 1000000% furious. Someone even brings up their names (mostly Geno but also Reaper) he starts growling. Like, without even really processing it. His loyalty to his brothers is palpable, and now he refuses to let anything hurt them. He chose a side finally, and he'd rather die than stand on the sidelines again like he did so many times before. Even for something like a bad break-up (or whatever these guys have going on) he treats it very very seriously. Is he good at comforting people? no, not really. Is he good at fighting? Yeag. (Picturing that first while after Dust agrees to bridge the gap again and start talking to Reaper and Geno again, Cross regularly lingers close to Dust when they're hanging out. I also think at least once when he managed to catch Geno on his own (literally just going to the library or something) he definitely gave Geno a proper shovel-talk. After that he felt a bit better.)

Horror with his distracting and redirecting is so so sweet. That guy is so stable for the sake of watching out for his friends and family, and he knows better than to let bad vibes linger and consume someone, especially with Dust and what he's seen of the other. He's normally so stoic, the only time he's seen any emotion is.Well. This. Horror just nudges towards his happiest moments and remind him that, yeah, they're cool stuff beyond all the stupid drama things going on with those two losers. Let's much on some snacks and train some horses :]

KILLER!!!! I don't think I can say it any more perfectly than you already did. Killer in this point is in his perfect moment of self-concern. Dust was always the one who didn't humor him much, even their first meeting Dust didn't let Killer get to him with his cocky, know-it-all attitude. He had always been vocal before about when Killer pushed too far. Had he missed the signs this time? had Dust known? why was this so different and how did it backfire so hard? He'd just so so sad :[ AND you say it later, but Dust hating the way Killer is walking on eggshells? As much as Killer was annoying and bothersome and stuck his nose into everything, Killer was still an important part of his life, and Killer suddenly being careful and quiet and thoughtful... It was nice he realized something was wrong, but it was so unlike him. To Dust, that's not Killer. And he thinks for a fact Killer can't be blamed for this, because he saw how determined Geno was to get to him for answers. if he'd used any magic at all, even stood too close to Geno for a bit, the other would've gotten just as curious, if not more. SO yeag, these brothers need to have a talk eventually, once things settle a little. (OH. And the drabble. In the. The. Geno mentioning Killer was his main pipeline of information on Dust? Killer would disown himself from the family if he heard Geno talking like that, because. Well. He'd just been trying to hype up his big brother, not expose his secrets to the one freak who wanted to study him under a microscope??? Jjust thought that was such a good detail, haha! That Geno listened more to Killer than he ever did to Dust, all things considered.)

Dust is. Yeah I love him. Just like me frfr, he just wants to ignore it and move on with life. Not worth the drama, not worth the tension and the risks, just move on. He put a stop to it, even if it was a little of a close call, and that's all there is! (Just like how he never talked about leaving his family, he can never talk about his brief courting period with those two, easy as pie.)

REAPER!!!! My boy Death going through it because he took his eye off his partner for .5 seconds <3.

But so fr. He had so many good things going for him. Because, I mean, is his kingdom a paradise? Hell yeah, that was the point, but Nightmare's castle was something different. He felt at ease and comfortable with Nightmare's crew. Nightmare himself and Error already felt like his little brothers (the moment Geno revealed Error was his little bro Reaper was mentally adopting him, but the reveal of the courtship between them had Reaper evenmore-so mentally adopting Night. They're business partners, but also they can be family outside of that!), the Knights, upon seeing their youngest brother trust Reaper and welcome him and Geno, they were quick to warm-up to them. Some more cautious than others (I think the order would be Killer, Cross, Horror, then Dust) and of course there's Ccino, who never quite got close enough to be too friendly, but he was always kind and welcoming.

And then Geno went and manipulated people! which, yeah, as you said he totally takes part of the blame for not watching Geno for that, but he also trusts his partner! Geno is his own person, a grown skeleton who should know better, or at least read the room. Reaper is relieved that Dust called it off, but knowing what little he did about Dust, Geno must've had to push him way too far for him to do that. So, yeah, the sudden feeling of being shut out, untrusted by the people he'd grown to care so deeply for in what little time he had spent? Yeah, it stung, and he couldn't defend Geno's actions in any meaningful way that wouldn't land them in a situation of threat of Assassination from Nightmare's Knights. (Very capable Knights, btw. He would literally never say it outloud, but any of the Knights would have a very good shot at 1v1 with him. He imagined Dust or Killer could get him no problem if they managed to sneak up on him, and Cross could have a chance too. Horror, he imagined, might be able to shatter his spine before anything else could happen. Any two of them against him, and he might be legitimately done-for, so he is NOT trying to start conflicts lmao.)

And Geno... dear, sweet, manipulative little toxic man... We've talked very deeply about him facing his consequences so I wont linger on that. But. The idea of him not being any less loved is so so important as you said. Idk why but I'm just picturing Error stopping by after the meeting he's banned from in the drabble and, telling Geno absolutely nothing ofc (this is lowkey a test to see if Reaper will tell him anything later on and blame it on Error), but checking in on him in general. Talking with him, asking him about the magic studies. Like, just enjoying sibling bonding time still, while also vehemently refusing to let him break the rules because?? Night's his partner, why would he do that??? C'mon Geno, you know him better than that???? (Also Error is a smug little shit that likes seeing his brother in the adult version of time-out for once lmao. Ofc he wants to see Dust safe, he's furious about it, but some part of him feels justice has been served when Geno finally can't gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss his way out of his old tendancies hehe-)

Okay I think I'm done but. Yeag. The sillies mean the world to me <3

Important plot point for the New Age AU post-story dustedafterdeath plot- (realizing now slight tw for abusive relationship???)

Geno is a manipulative bastard who exerts his skill and prowess over others. With Reaper their relationship was balanced and became healthy thanks to Reaper actually being stronger than Geno. So all of Geno's manipulation was more like an angry chihuahua barking at Reaper. They got over that stage fast.

With Dust?? He doesn't realize he can't show his interest the same way. Doesn't occur to him that Dust is "lesser" than him in every situation. Royal Mage against a Knight, the Mage has more political power. Geno has direct ties to Reaper, who they need to keep happy for Night's treaty. Geno has more technical skill w/ his magic and Dust is sure the technique and control would be enough to best his own barely controlled magic. He's physically weaker, especially after his shoulder injury. So when Geno realizes he's caught feelings he feels guilty, but doesn't stop manipulating him?? Because Reaper was fine with it, so clearly that's how romance works right?

And it is (shocker) NOT how romance works.

While Dust is being low key pampered and spoiled by Reaper (Reaper recognizes the power dynamics very vividly and I'd sure to make sure Dust knows he can say No or Stop at any moment to anything, even hand-holding or escorting, and Reaper respects it) as Reaper compliments him and gives him gifts and asks how he's been. Geno is out here hyperfixated on Dust's latent magic and is getting his way to learn more no matter the cost (which, in this case, is faking romantic interest). And Reaper doesn't realize how intense Geno is bring because he *thought* Geno would know better. And with the fragile situation, Dust doesn't speak up.

So, ofc, it all comes to a head when Geno finally realizes he's gone too far, Dust completely shuts him out. And Geno is too proud to face his consequences and come clean to Dust about his intentions. Dust, usually quiet anyways, just moves on, though he's deeply distrustful of every pampering Reaper does for him now.

It isn't until 2 days later that Error is talking with Geno (y'know, brother gossip) and Error asks how it's going with Dust.

When Geno responds that his plan fell through, Error asks for elaboration, and Geno tell him the jist. Leas Dust on, then let him down gently. But he caught feels and Dust didn't seem to like the advances so he gave up. And Error knows his brother and knows that's not the full story. So they change subjects, and Error convinces Geno to go visit the woods on the edge of town to test a new weapon of his.

But once they're out there and alone Error reads his brother the riot act because he's so furious and disappointed!!! Dust of all people?? Manipulating him??? And when Geno tries to defend himself (digging a deeper hole and processing just how awful he was himself as he says it out loud) Error just straight up pulls him into combat. (And Geno, not wanting to accidentally hurt his brother but also furious + caught up in emotion, fights back.)

They beat eachother into the trees and the rocks and just tear into eachother, but by the time the Knights arrive to see what the problem is (the cats got word to Ccino, and Ccino sent Dust and Cross to figure it out) Geno is pretty much on low hp and Error is wounded but still standing.

Error spots the Knights and basically uses his strings to slam Geno to the ground at Dust's feet. And there's this moment of frustration and sorrow that seems to pass between the three of them, before Cross (<- unaware) asks what Error was thinking!

Error just says he'll explain it later and that they can go back now. Cross should carry Geno. Error would explain to Reaper (Geno flinched at that).

They return, and Error pulls Reaper aside to mutter some things to him. Reaper seems distressed and takes Geno from Cross, but doesn't even seem bothered at seeing his lover as roughed up as he was. He excuses them away, and Dust disappears into his room.

Error hunts down Dust and chills with him a bit. Error apologizes on his brother's behalf, and Dust seems just. Out of it. He won't say it's okay, because it's not, but he won't put pressure on Error because it's definitely not the kid's fault. So he settles on a tired laugh and thanking Error for beating up his big brother for him. (Error and Geno are on level playing field. As siblings, as Royal Mages, as partners to their kings. They are evenly matched in almost every way, so Error had the power to stand up for Dust, and Dust appreciates that.)

Amd after that little interaction, Dust actually realizes he's alright. He has people who will look out for him. Who will make sure everything goes smoothly. AND after joking with Error some more? He realizes Geno just. Has weird priorities. Weird ways of showing his affection. Dust decides he won't give Geno a second shot unless he bends and gives up his weird manipulation with Dust.

It takes a few days before Geno is done wallowing and processing, but he comes to find Dust (Reaper right behind him, supposedly to keep him in line) looking like a prideful lil wet cat. He says he's sorry, and that he realizes it was shitty of him, and that he will respect it if Dust wants him and Reaper to stop bothering him.

Dust clarifies and asks if Reaper was being genuine. (He was.) And he asks of Geno would be willing to give being genuine a shot (a hesitant yes). Dust does not push them away, but he does say he is going to inform Night. He also asks them to swear that no matter where the relationship ends, they will not take it out on Nightmare. (They agree.)

Like. Reaper, the romantic who is actually kind and wants to make lasting relationships *before* acting on his desires. Vs. Geno, the guy driven by desires who seems to stumble across romance by mistake every time. Both after Dust, most emotionally bottled skeleton they've ever met? Wild.

Geno is super toxic about his relationships and doesn't even notice in my aus ig. Goofy ahh. He eventually gets his conscience back. But it's. A struggle.

In the other au I have Dust guilt-trip him into being less of an idiot. In this one I make his brother throw him around like a ragdoll. (To Error, violence is often the answer <3)

[quaranmine]

random firewatch au detail that has basically no impact on the story unless you want to psychoanalyze fw!grian even further than i did as the author, but it's very intentional that i always refer to both of mumbo's parents but only grian's mom. did i give him daddy issues? i guess so, but not in a way where i really deeply examined the implications as meaningful to the story. it was just a detail i stuck with from the beginning as a way to keep fleshing out the story's background subtly. the idea behind grian's dual citizenship was always that he was born in america to an american dad and british mom, and that his mom moved back to the UK when he was very young since she wanted to be closer to her family. perhaps his dad didn't go with them? or perhaps his dad did, and then later they split and he went back to america? whatever the cause, grian never even mentions his dad in the story, and it wasn't because i intended him to be dead (because that would have come up in a story about grief) if you get me

[northern-passage]

Genuine thought as a fellow trans dude, I’ve seen a lot of (obviously non-serious) questions on other blogs about characters’ genitals such as “how does it look like?” and similar, and I think we all know & understand that such questions are extremely inappropriate to ask and (I hope) no one would actually go around asking these questions irl. Idk, I think we should treat trans characters just like cis ones, without any special “precautions”, so to normalise them and not make cis people treat them like fragile boxes, a thing which happens to a lot of us irl. Hope this doesn’t come off as an attack or anything lol.

no worries, i didn't take this as an attack at all. i actually agree with you, that's why i mentioned feeling conflicted about it and also mentioned that i've changed my stance on how i felt about handling Noel and Clementine in game and in explicit intimate scenes.

however, for me the problem comes from the fact that people... don't ask these kinds of questions about cis characters? i suppose people do get cheeky "who is the biggest 🤪" asks but i would hardly compare the two. to be a bit crude, no one is going to be asking if a cis character has a dick or not, or "what does it look like". of course it's natural for people to be curious, and i honestly encourage the open discussion and am happy to see trans bodies being talked about more in a positive way, but not everyone is going to be comfortable with it due to the inescapable transphobia online and in the community. sending me that kind of ask is like sending out an invitation for a debate or a discussion that i don't necessarily want to have. i also just don't think people should default to asking a random IF author on tumblr dot com to describe what bottom growth looks like.

and with most of these asks typically coming from someone who is anonymous, i have no way of truly knowing what the tone is, what their intentions are or why this is being asked - is it another trans person? or maybe someone who is just genuinely curious? or, more likely in my experience, is it someone who is going to immediately follow up this message with something transphobic after i answer? do i want to roll the dice and find out?

so while i agree with what you're saying, it's important to consider the context and the reality we live in. the IF community is not kind to trans people or trans characters. and as a trans person, my first priority is protecting myself and my mental health. so what i mean when i say "precautions," is that those precautions are for me, because i've had to deal with transphobic harassment here for years now, and i try to mitigate it as much as i can. it's also for my personal comfort - again, to be blunt, i'm simply just not comfortable discussing a trans character's genitals with anonymous strangers on the internet. it makes me feel vulnerable.

also i do want to say i didn't mean for any of that to come across as a dig at other authors - if you're comfortable answering those kinds of questions, that's really only something you can decide for yourself. like i said, this is just coming from my own experiences in IF and for my own personal comfort - i have previously talked a lot about trans stuff and gender and sexuality here, when i'm feeling up to it, but it is something that is very draining for me and can also be very upsetting.

basically: i do agree that it's important not to other trans characters or treat them any differently than cis characters, but i also think there are ways to do it that don't require me answering invasive questions or questions that i don't feel comfortable with as a real life trans person, you know what i mean?

[theghostofashton]

.

[marnz]

Just wanted to say since this post discusses the Bush administration: I think it's really important to stress that a) our invasion of Iraq had nothing to do with 9/11 and b) the government had been prepping for a war with Iraq since the late 90s. When Bush, Cheney, and Rumsfeld used 9/11 as a justification for the invasion, they were lying. They aren't connected.

Some background: Bush and Cheney started planning the invasion of Iraq in their first few days of office. 9/11 definitely gave them an excuse but it did not plant the idea. I also think it's helpful to learn more about the context of the Iraq invasion--the ""justification"" for the invasion was a chemical weapons program that was started in 1980 for Iraq's war with Iran, and abandoned after the Gulf War (1991). The UN worked on disarming Iraq after the Gulf War, and as late as 2002 was in the country looking for weapons and active weapons manufacturing, which they did not find. But US Foreign Policy concentrated on removing Saddam Hussain from power starting in the late 90s, which is not what the UN called for.

I really recommend the book Night Draws Near by Anthony Shadid. It covers the 2003 invasion of Iraq from the point of view of the Iraqi people, and gives a lot of necessary context.

I also think that when we talk about the monstrous actions of the Bush administration, it's absolutely crucial to include Donald Rumsfeld, the Secretary of Defense who, along with Cheney and Bush, signed off on Guantanamo Bay and the torture (euphemistically called "enhanced interrogation techniques"). Rumsfeld was also first to propose a possible connection between 9/11 and Iraq, and was told over and over again there was no connection, which he ignored. He also planned the invasion and occupation of Afghanistan in order to fight Al-Qaeda, nevermind the fact that as soon as the US invaded Al-Qaeda and much of the Taliban's senior leadership fled to Pakistan (as covered in the amazing book No Good Men Among the Living by Anand Gopal).

When we talk about how monstrous the Bush administration was, we talk a lot about Cheney as if he was solely responsible for their actions. And I do think he drove a lot of the decisions. But at the end of the day I think it's important to understand that Bush, his cabinet, and congress had every opportunity to turn back from these wars, to withdraw, to stop, to be honest with the people of this country, to refuse to torture people, to shut down Guantanamo Bay (for example, Obama wanted to shut it down and in response congress passed a law making sure it stayed open). And they did not. It was and has been a coordinated effort from multiple people, multiple agencies, and multiple chains of commands to continue on this path for 20+ years.

I can't get over the fact that Dick fucking Cheney said, basically, that Trump is too evil of a dude for him to get behind.

That's like... fuck, idk... that's like Dick Cheney saying a politician is too fucking evil for him to work with. The dude who famously shot a dude in the face and the dude apologized to him. That fucking guy.

[binders-and-beanies]

Pondering bottom surgery in the tags I mf guess